The secret to faithfulness is being you, consistently. It’s showing up for the people who are important to you, even when it would be easier to take a day off. It’s not some magic skill that takes an advanced degree. It takes persistence and determination. You have to recognize that the people who love you will understand your faithfulness by what you show them, not by what you say or promise.
I get up in front of thousands of people every week and talk about the same topics I’m discussing with you right now. And I’d be the world’s biggest hypocrite if I didn’t live what I profess. I couldn’t live with myself, and, more importantly, the people who know me would know I was a fraud. I’m not perfect by any stretch of the imagination, but I’m most proud of what my family would say about me if I weren’t around. I think that’s a pretty good goal for anybody to shoot for.
I make more than 250 appearances around the country every year, but I do whatever I can to avoid staying overnight. If that means getting up at 4 a.m. to feed the horse and dogs and catching the 7 a.m. flight out of Dallas so I can be back after dinner, then that’s what I do, because I want to be home for my family.
A few years ago, I flew to Houston to speak to a group of 1,200 teachers, and then caught a flight back that afternoon. As I was returning home from the airport, I received a call from the local Fox television affiliate. They were putting together a story about why some teenagers seem to get along great with their parents, and they wanted to observe my family at dinner time.
I said I’d have to check with the boss first, and I called Margaret. My son Zach answered the phone, and he said that mom had gone to the movies.
I called the reporter back and said that if they didn’t need to shoot in the house—Margaret doesn’t like those kinds of surprises—and they could get it done in an hour, I’d talk to them. I didn’t want to waste too much time because it was a perfect afternoon and Zach and I were going waterskiing.
When I got out of the car in front of our garage, Zach was getting the ski boat ready.
“I’ve got a surprise for you,” I said, as the Fox satellite truck pulled in behind me. “Did you do something wrong?” Zach asked, eyeing the truck and the cameramen who were getting out of it.
I hadn’t thought of that, and I laughed.
Before I had a chance to say anything, the reporter walked over to Zach and put the microphone in front of him.
“Your dad flew back from a talk in Houston this afternoon so he could go waterskiing with you. I’ve known him for almost 15 years, and he’s always been that way. What does that tell you?” he asked.
Zach paused for a minute, and his lower lip started to quiver.
“It tells us he loves us,” Zach said.
I gave him a hug, and told him—with a laugh—that I’d forgive all the mistakes he had made in his life.
Stop telling people that you love them, show them.
Stop telling them that you are faithful, show them.
Stop telling them that you believe you can make a difference, show them.
Stop telling them how important they are to you, show them.
It’s becoming harder and harder to hear what you are telling them because your actions are making so much noise.
My house isn’t an easy house. We’ve had all kinds of adventures—and misadventures—over the last few years. In each of the last six years, we’ve had some major health scares—a blown out knee, a broken back, and Viral Meningitis. But the reason I have what I have is because I’m faithful. My kids and my wife know they can count on me—that I’m going to be there when things are great and when they are rotten. They know that I love them not because of what they give me or do for me, but because of who they are.
When I come home, they say, “Hi, dad.” It’s who I am. They’re not saying, “Hi, neighbor,” or “Hi, friend.” When you have a child and you see that baby for the first time, you know that feeling. But for some people, that feeling fades. Being in a family becomes work. But that feeling hasn’t faded for me. I remember it every day.
I’m not trying to say I’m some superhero father or husband. I’m just a regular guy. I’m not super smart, or super anything. I’m not doing anything anybody else couldn’t do. But I’ve decided to do it. I’m blessed with a lot of energy, and I’ve committed myself to bringing that energy home—faithfully.
The Good Life Rules!
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